If you read this to the end, please know I will own your soul! Forever…
Joking aside, it is to protect you against someone misusing your data. And the best bit of the GDPR is that it’s understandable and spells things out quite clearly. Oh, and protects you.
To comply with GDPR (General Data Protection Regulation), the DPA (Data Protection Act) and the PECR (Privacy and Electronic Communications Regulations) I have created this page. I also agree to follow every part by the law.
I use Google analytics, of which I don’t really know how it works, but it gives me beautiful graphs of where you and all my other visitors are going and not going.
I do this because I want to give you the best possible experience and don’t want to show you stuff you are not interested in.
Also, I look through your window at night. I’m joking, I don’t. I’m too busy.
However, I do collect data that you give me via contact forms and sign up forms in order to send you a reply, newsletter, weekly wisdom emails, and any new products that I create. In each case, it is clearly stated on the form.
Plus, here’s a good thing.
You can ask me at any time to show you what information I hold, and also to completely delete your existence. Wait, not entirely just from my websites.
Any data you give me is safe, encrypted, and stored in such a way that I do not fully understand. However, I will not share it with anyone.
Let me whisper you something. It’s a private arrangement between me and you.
Cookies, who doesn’t like cookies. Well, I use the most boring geeky cookies you can ever imagine. They literally consist of more data.
Why? Because I know it is you. I put a cookie on your computer, phone and every time you request a webpage I know it is you. Otherwise, I would have to ask you every single time who you are. And that would be super annoying.
That way, when you click to hide something on my website it will be hidden until the cookie runs out of time or you browse from a different place.
Like Saturn or somewhere.
I nearly forgot, but I use social media. And, I should imagine you do too.
I promote my courses, the academy, as well as my opinions and beliefs. I use it as an outlet to promote my services, share great content, reach out to new visitors and customers.
Mostly, I use social media to connect with people. To connect with you. The chances are you found my website, this website through social media.
This includes Facebook, Twitter, Pinterest, LinkedIn, Instagram, and that’s all I can remember for the moment.
What they collect regarding data is up to them and their moral compass and I cannot be held responsible for that. Talk to Mark Zuckerberg, now I don’t want a lawsuit on my desk but I’m guessing he knows more about what Facebook collect than I do.
I do, host what’s called a Facebook pixel. Again, I don’t know how it works. However, it enables me to advertise on Facebook to somebody that has visited my website.
For example, have you ever wondered how you visit a website and you look at the super delicious expensive chocolates to buy for your partner and then suddenly 3 days later; boom right in the middle of your Facebook feed while your partner is sat behind you, there are the chocolates. They do it because they knew you visited the website and they presume you are interested in their product.
There you go as a gift for getting near the end, you have learnt something about how marketers destroy secret surprises. Well, they destroy everything actually. Frankly, I’m crap at it so I shouldn’t imagine you will see an advert from me in the near future. Although, you never know.
You’ve got to the end, seriously?
You are either a lawyer trying to catch me out or a secret geek like me and was curious.
Either way, congratulations. You are a hero.
PS if you are a lawyer, I’m open to free advice on making it more entertaining…
We have come to the end.
I would like to wish you farewell, and I assure you no data, cookies were harmed in the making of your visit here.
Go mindfully, tread carefully and remember one day, none of this will matter.